Parent/Coach Communication
Parenting and coaching provide immeasurable rewards for those who are fortunate enough to experience these vocations. However, neither is without potential "speed bumps" and by promoting appropriate communication and an understanding of each position, we are better able to accept the actions of the other and provide greater benefit to our student-athletes. Clear and consistent communication between students, coaches, and parents is an important element in any successful athletic program.
When issues arise, we recommend that the student-athlete communicate with the coach directly prior to any parental involvement. Although these conversations are not always easy, we believe that it is in the student's best interest (in both the short and long term) to take the first step in an attempt to address any concerns that he or she may be feeling. That said, our coaches are always available, through the proper channels, to the parents of the student-athletes in their charge.
Communication parents and student-athletes should expect from coaches:
- An overview of the philosophy of the coach and the program.
- Expectations the coach has for the team and for each individual athlete.
- Location and time of all practices and contests, as well as the announcement of schedule changes in a timely fashion.
- Team requirements regarding policy, attendance, behavior, equipment, out-of-season expectations, etc.
- Procedure to be followed should your child be injured while participating.
- Any discipline of your child that results in the denial of your child's participation.
- Team selection process (Varsity/JV, "A Team"/ "B Team")
Communication coaches should expect from student-athletes and parents:
- Notification of any schedule conflicts in a timely fashion.
- Concerns should be expressed directly to the coach.
- The coach should be made aware of medical/injury issues of the student-athlete.
- General support of the overall mission of the program.
Coaches are certainly available to parents to discuss issues that may arise. Here are some guidelines for setting up such a meeting:
- Call or email the coach to request an appointment.
- If the coach can not be reached, contact the Athletic Director to request that a meeting be set up for you.
- Do not attempt to confront a coach before, during, or after a contest or practice. These confrontations can be emotional for parents and coaches and do not often promote successful resolution.
- "24-hour" suggestion....When dealing with issues that may be somewhat emotional, when possible we recommend that parents and coaches wait 24 hours before meeting to discuss the issue.
- We recommend that the student-athlete attend the parent/coach meeting.
If the parent/coach meeting does not provide satisfactory resolution:
- Call or email the Athletic Director to set up an appointment.
- We recommend that the coach be present for such a meeting.
- If that meeting does not provide satisfactory resolution, further discussion may be pursued with the Headmaster or appropriate Division Director.
- For the benefit of the student-athlete, the coach, and the program, it is important that the appropriate "chain-of-command" approach is followed, in this order:
- Discussion between student-athlete and coach.
- Parent/Coach discussion or meeting.
- Meeting with the Athletic Director.
- Appointment or discussion with the Headmaster or Division Director.
Appropriate concerns for parents to discuss with coaches:
- The coach's interaction with the student-athlete.
- The student-athlete's interaction with others.
- Evaluation of performance of the student-athlete.
- Suggestions for ways to improve performance.
- "Off the Field" issues that the coach may be able to help with (time management, academic, behavioral, etc.)
Issues not appropriate for parents to discuss with coaches:
- Team strategy and/or lineup decisions.
- Issues involving other student-athletes.
Some suggestions for parents:
- At contests, refrain from the impulse to "coach" or "officiate" from the stands. While you will not always agree with decisions made by coaches or officials, comments of that nature will be (at best) uncomfortable and (at worst) embarrassing for your child, the coach, and other spectators.
- Help the coaches foster a "team" atmosphere. At times that will involve some individual sacrifice on the part of the student-athletes, but in the long run it will benefit all who participate in our programs.
- Support the coach's interest in the student-athletes' well-being beyond their specific sport. Reinforce with your child the idea that coaches have the authority (and responsibility) to make decisions and policies based on concepts such as attitude, academic approach, reliability, and interaction with others.
- Try not to be critical of the coach in front of your child. This provides a message that will not help him/her to have as positive an experience as possible.
- Encourage your child to compete "for the love of the game." Getting too concerned with things such as who is doing the scoring, who is getting the publicity, post-season awards, etc. can make a student-athlete forget why he or she loves athletics.
- Be a positive fan. Support all of the student-athletes on the team, not just your son or daughter. Try to attend a few GSB contests that don't involve your child.
Some taken from: NJSIAA, Princeville High School (IL), Deer Creek Schools (OK)
